I'm not ready to let go...

I'm up and very tired.  I could blame it on the baby, but that isn't the whole truth.

It has a lot to do with the panic rising up in my chest. 

I'm not ready to let go of this season.

Don't get me wrong. I'm so over standing in long shopping lines, rushing to bake several things all in 3 hrs, staying up too late wrapping and going non stop.

I'm done with those crazy parts of the holiday palooza that is November and December. 

But I'm not quite ready to let go of...

 watching the magic fill their eyes.

 cuddling up close for whole afternoons.

letting everyone enjoy more treats than we should.

having the Man home to play with our littles.

taking time to just enjoy the giggles and be silly.

being surrounded by so many quiet, sacred moments. 

the Christmas Carol karaoke we had in the car.

reasons to dress up and get out of my yoga pants and tshirts.

simply taking a break from reality to enjoy the simplest of life's goodness.

I'm revolting.

No one can leave the house tomorrow.

No work. No school. No appointments.

This is me in denial.

Praying for a snow day.

: )

God gives God

Christmas time is such a beautiful melody of memories and excitement for what's to come.

For many it's a nostalgic season that is sparked by the smells of baking, sights of colored, twinkling lights and the sounds of long ago carols wafting through the night. 

It's family and friends gathered together.  Reminiscing of Christmases past and making new memories laughing over the children's squeals. Just writing this brings a smile to my face thinking of the squeals we've heard just this year.

 It's the kids off of school enjoying their childhoods and the adults taking time from their usually busy schedules to enjoy the season.  Shopping in crowded stores for the perfect gifts, sipping hot chocolate from crammed backseats as you awe over the miles of Christmas lights and cuddled up in your living room reciting each line of you favorite holiday movie.

It's the anticipation for what's to come in the new year.  Fresh starts as clean as the white snow we all wish for this season.  Past regrets gone, hopes for the dreams of tomorrow start now.  It's an exhilarating time.  It's magical and dreamy.

Though I can't help but have my mind clouded with something else the last week.  This season can be extremely hard and rough on people.  There is heartache, devastated families and illness that loom over the magic of Christmas.  I have several friends that are struggling. Whether it be spending the first Christmas alone after a break up/divorce, depression, financial stresses or a family member's illness.  It can all seem too much, I'm sure.  

That's why we must realize our greatest gift of the season isn't one under the tree. 

Like a child, I wish I could run in Christmas morning to peek under the tree to find no more pain, freedom from fear or sin and especially no more death.

Though it's not under a tree where we find those things.... we can have them.

Maybe not just like we want.  We can't keep our loved one from having terminal cancer.  This gift won't pay off the debt that is overwhelming you. It won't even immediately clear up the crippling depression you are dealing with. 

But it does give us HOPE for a future home where there is no more pain, freedom from fear/sin and no more death. It also gives us peace like a warm blanket on a cold night to battle this hard life. It can give us a clean future and grace from our struggles.  Give us purpose and a compass to help us navigate our way while we are waiting for that new home.

Please over all the other expensive gifts and precious moments of this Christmas, take time to 

consider this gift. It's unlike any you'll ever have. 

This quote says it best,

“God gives God. That is the gift God always ultimately gives. Because nothing is greater and we have no greater need, God gives God. God gives God, and we only need to slow long enough to unwrap the greatest Gift with our time: time in His Word, time in His presence, time at His feet.”  

~ Ann Voskamp, The Greatest Gift


Merry Christmas, friends!
My heart and prayers are with the many families and friends who are hurting tonight.
May Christ be ever so near to us all.

What will they remember?

I have, as most of you out there, been hustling and bustling trying to squeeze as much holiday traditions into the few days of December. I'm always excitedly running about making plans or trying out a new idea to celebrate with the kids. Tonight as I watched my kids dancing around to the music resonating from the old Christmas record we put on, my mind wondered.  After a day full of all the good stuff childhoods are made of.... snow day off of school, sledding, hot cocoa drinking and taking in holiday movies, I wondered just what would they remember about Christmas?

I often stop and think of my own childhood. The many traditions unfolding in my memories through the years of joy and wonder.  I loved snow days and the chance to play all day without any borders on our time of fun.  It's amazing how many lines I can still quote from the movie White Christmas and other favorites. There's so much good stuff between plays at school, going to look at lights in our maroon old mini van, decorating our little tree for our room, shopping with Daddy for Moma's presents, the many holiday parties, Christmas Eve services at my Nanny's church and of course the excitement of Christmas morning.

All those memories don't contain my Mom yelling at us for not wanting to participate in the photo for our family card or her getting frustrated at the 4 year old for turning too many days over in the advent calendar. Or her being so busy making plans for us to "celebrate" together that she forgot to relax so we could just enjoy what we were doing. Now maybe my mother did do some of those things, but I don't remember them.  I think that is because even though she isn't perfect, that wasn't the tone of our holidays.  All I remember is how much she loved Christmas and the joy that she brought to us.  I can see her now standing at the kitchen sink working and singing...

O holy Child of Bethlehem, descend to us, we pray;
Cast out our sin, and enter in, be born in us today.

That is what I remember about her and about Christmas.  Joy over a Savior.  A peaceful home on quiet snowy evenings.  The thrill of the magic that filled most everyday of the month of December.  I think I remember it this way because of her.  Not because her hot cider was just perfect (though it was) or she got us all the right gifts.  I don't remember if we made it to every local holiday event.  There was no pinterest and list of crafts that we had to rush through.  I think I have such fond memories of Christmas because she enjoyed it...with us.

We often forget as mother's that we set the tone for homes.  Especially so during the holiday season.  If we are frazzled and frantic with all the to do's, then our children might catch on to our moods. My heart is always in the right place. I want them to enjoy this season and I want to share with them the treasure of Jesus.  Even if it seems like I'm cramming it every nook and cranny of our time. Over all the greatest of memories my mother gave me, the best was that of seeing Jesus every year.  Isn't that what I want... for them...for me.  Going back to the Christmas carol my mother used to sing and we all know, O Little Town of Bethleham's lyrics....


Cast out our sin, and enter in, be born in us today.

I'm going to try to relax and stop making soo many lists.  I will sit a little longer with my toddler and the plastic nativity scene. Peace will be in my heart and I will speak love through the different stressful events/busy moments over the next few weeks. When my children ask me to sing "Angels We Have Heard On High" for the hundredth time, I'll do it with a smile on my face.  Because I want their memories to be how their Mommy was full of joy as she would sing about how the heavens broke loose with praise over the newborn Messiah.

snow day...25 or so years ago.

A Blessed Inheritance

A good man leaves an inheritance to his children's children,

but the sinner's wealth is laid up for the righteous. Proverbs 13:22, ESV

I cannot imagine our lives without our parents and grandparents.  They give us support, help and joy!  Our kids are forever blessed by the love that is lavished on them by all their grandparents. It is true what Proverbs says...that "a good man leaves an inheritance to his children's children".   I'm so grateful for the many good things our children are inheriting from our parents and Scott's grandparents.  

Happy Grandparent's Day to

Papa & Key, Grandaddy Herman & Granny, Papaw & Nana, and Grandaddy Jeff!

We love you!

3 years....oh my!

It's crazy to think that 3 years ago I became a mother.  It wasn't how I expected. My water didn't break in the middle of the night. I didn't need to call my doctor. No one rushed me away to the hospital. My husband wasn't even actually with me.  No, I didn't spend hours in labor or have a swaddled newborn thrust into my arms after birthing them.  My motherhood experience started at McDonalds.  Seeming perfect, right?!?!?  Ha!

I remember the days after getting the call.  Planning, making sure I had a few clothes in their right sizes and mostly praying.  As most new mothers, I was very anxious.  Unsure what to expect. I prayed. A lot! Asking God to help me...unsure of this task in front of me, but wanting it with every fiber of my being.  What if they hated me?  Cried when I took them home? But at last, I was there. Parking my car and looking through the playplace windows.

I saw what seemed to be a whiz of a boy (sort of think Flash from The Incredibles) whirling around the room.  I'm pretty sure I didn't even get a great look at his face until I gazed at it through the rear view mirror on the way home as he was finally strapped still.  : )  But I do remember as he ran past me giggling thinking, I never heard a sound so sweet before.  I can also squeeze my eyes real hard and picture her tiny face.  The big brown eyes gazing at me, her puffy little cheeks and the sweetest little fountain of hair held by a small bow on top of her head.  I remember picking her up for the first time....so confused about what laid ahead, but knowing our lives would never be the same.

It's hard to remember those first days and I will not lie.  Unlike, the hazy yet quiet sweetness of bringing home a newborn, our beginning was tough.  Adoption is a beautiful gift born out of a tragic loss.  We do live in a broken world, scared by sin.  Adoption shows those scars, but just like the world Christ comes in with rays of hope.  Good things, joyful hearts and bonds that only He can forge are the other side of those scars.

Isaiah 61:3 says...

to grant to those who mourn in Zion—
to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes,
the oil of gladness instead of mourning,
the garment of praise instead of a faint spirit;
that they may be called oaks of righteousness,
the planting of the Lord, that he may be glorified.

I like to think that is the story of us.  My ashes of my sick heart because of hope deferred...their ashes of a childhood torn apart was made into a beautiful headdress that is now the Thompson family.  I will never forget the pain in waiting for children, or the struggles of our adoption because to me it only increases the delight and glory of the power of our God.  He took a sad, childless woman and two children without a home to make them whole as a family.  That is the beauty of adoption...taking something broken and making it whole. That is what He did for me through salvation.  I was broken, sinful and stained by this world around me.  But PRAISE to HIM for not leaving me alone.  Instead, through the sacrifice of His son, He adopted me. Made me His child.  Made me whole. A sweet  friend got me this necklace and it says it best in why we wanted to adopt...

we love because He first loved us.

1 John 4: 19

So happy "Gotcha Day" (back on July 18th) to our first and second born children.

July 2010

June 2013

more than a SPRINKLE of love

We decided to throw my sister a little Sprinkle to celebrate her third baby. 

A girl.

Maggie Ann.

 I thought this sweet little cake turned out well.

 We held it in a back room of a local restaurant, Colby's.

So I only decorated one small table.

 I made sure it was ultra girly!!!

 My gorg pregnant sister.

 She got some great special things for her newest babe.

 It was really intimate and we had lots of great conversation.

 socializing at these events has to be my favorite part!

 I got my sweet nieces matching bibs...remember my sister has a 1 year old girl too. : )

 CAKE!

 Mother and Daughter

She knows how to take care of two little thirteen months apart....my sis and me.

I know these little girls will share a special bond just like we do.

 Love this little fella...the only boy at the party.  He got to flirt with all of us and he wooed us with his smiles.  I mean look how precious he is!!!

 the Brown side ladies

 Sisters

This last pic is just a shot of details...my fav things...lace, cute clothes pins, bakers twine and doily.