Thursday, November 12, 2009

Warning: SEVERE Sappiness

I'm having one of those days that all of a sudden you realize how quickly life sneeks up on you! I was thinking the other day of how not too many years ago, my heart was longing. Longing for the one that God had for me. Let's just be honest, my heart longed for MANY MANY years. I guess I feel the need to share just how my heart ached and how guilty I would feel for being discontent with all the other blessings that God had given me. I know (because I was one of them) that there are several girls out there struggling just to make sense of how "their" plans are not going the way they'd hoped. They are frustrated, lonely, and trying to reconcile this with the hope they have in Christ. Most people knew I longed for my husband, but still saw my happy-go-lucky face. But there are a few who endured with me... the saints who labored in praying for me and listening to my angst. They know the truth. My heart was sick. When I'd finally get alone, I would cry and wonder what was wrong with me. I even wondered why God would allow so many to find their "now" family, but I was waiting. I could never describe how I truly felt until I found this verse:

"Hope deffered makes the heart sick, but desired fulfilled is the tree of life." Proverbs 13:12

It was the truth, my heart was sick from waiting. But ladies I want to give you HOPE!
Here he is:
(Isn't he dreamy!!!)

I'm not going to tell you any magical potion on how I believe my prayers were FINALLY answered. It wasn't when I finally was content with being single (believe me). I hated when people would tell me that when I found contentment with where I was, God would most likely bless me with a husband then. I just found myself striving for something for the WRONG reasons and failing to find it (resulting in more frustration). All I can tell you is my Hope was the Lord. I knew He gave good things to His people and that He made Marriage for a reason. I strongly BELIEVED that God would answer my prayers. It was obviously not in my timing, but God had good reasons for that (Scott is 3 1/2 years younger than me).

So I have a few suggestions from a (previously) single lady to another:
  • PRAY! Don't stop praying! I would go through spouts of time where I'd give up and then the very next day, I'd be contesting to the Lord again. "The Lord will accomplish what concerns me; Thy lovingkindness, O Lord, is everlasting; Do not forsake the works of Thy hands." Ps. 138:8 I'm no scholar, but I believe God never tires of hearing His children's hearts. So keep asking and talking it out with Him.
  • STRIVE FOR CONTENTMENT: I know you hate hearing this...I did. Even though we may never reach this point (because we always struggle with contentment, like now I want babies...i must wait), we can't give up striving for it. We definitely don't want to wish our lives away, but that can be the very thing we are doing. ENJOY today! Though my heart ached during the season of singleness, I did have many moments of bliss! Sweet times with the Lord, memorable trips, treasured time with family, plenty of creative space for hobbies, amazing moments with my girlfriends, satisfying times of serving others, and a lot of FUN. Don't waste these moments and seek Christ for your joy!
  • BE MARRIAGE MINDED: I was in the book store once perusing Godly books (ok, they were really Bride /Martha: Wedding shoot me), but I came across this book: Getting Serious About Getting Married. I Seriously laughed out loud! Then I looked around quickly to make sure no one saw me (same way i did with my bridal magazines). But after looking through it, I thought it had some good points. You need to decided what you want and share with close friends what you want in a marriage. The point of it is as a church (Christian body) we should be helping others be married (if they want). God created marriage and it's sacred. We are responsible for helping others meet and be around "Godly - marriage minded" people.
  • HAVE HOPE: Christ came that we may live and live abundantly. He came that we might have hope. So take courage because God is our HOPE and we can TRUST Him. I, obviously, cannot promise every single will get married. I also can't promise that I'll have babies. Or that my husband will live a long life beside me or that I'lll live a long life. The point is we can Hope in Christ for Godly desires. And marriage is a Godly desire. So don't loose hope. Be encouraged.
  • BE EXCITED: Be excited because marriage is good. IT IS WORTH THE WAIT! I would wait all those (sometimes dreadful) years again if it meant I got to be married to Scott. He is a gift to me from our Lord. He knew Scott was BEST for me, and I wouldn't trade that for anything. I used to get so upset with women complaining about their husbands while I sat long side them longing. Don't listen to others when they complain about marriage. Of course it has it's hardships and trials like every other season of life, but IT IS GOOD!
I hope this testimony of a then sadden single gal, encourages you and brings you some joy in your waiting! Thank you God for bringing the MAN into my life and answering soo many prayers. Thank you for making him Godly, caring, compassionate, fun to be with, gentle, helpful, and soo much more. May I use our marriage and being a wife to your glory!

"I am my beloved's, and his desire is for me." Song of Songs 7:10


RachelD said...

A little late in commenting, but awesome post. :) Yay for being my fabulous married friend who is so encouraging.

Jessica said...

I just love your heart, friend! Praise the Lord...He has given you such a wonderful testimony of long-suffering and trust in Him. His timing is indeed perfect!
Thanking God for YOU and the MAN!

emily jochim said...

sarah beth, this is beautiful! i think i felt the same way before my awesome husband came along...and there was no magic formula or potion. God is so good!

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